1. Tina Fey won an Emmy for her impersonation of Sarah Palin. It’s the first time an actor has won a major award for portraying a politician since Robert DeNiro’s Oscar for playing John McCain in “Raging Bull”.
2. Part of a 1,000-year-long piece of music is finally going to be played live. There was some disagreement about whether it was the longest piece of music ever, but Guinness officials said it only feels like a thousand years when you listen to a Jessica Simpson album.
3. A teacher in France was fined for biting a student. Until they found out she was a vampire, at which point she got a movie deal.
4. A new study says that bacteria use nitric oxide to defend themselves. Apparently, they originally used nitrous oxide, but the bacteria kept laughing so much, they were easy targets.
5. Ford is going to sell a car that uses fighter jet technology to make it safer. That blows. I thought it would be missiles or make the car break the sound barrier. What’s next, a car that uses AK-47 technology to make better airbags?
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