1. In Germany, they’re now selling a bra that is bullet-proof. And we thought men in the U.S. were obsessed with breasts. “Forget the head! We must protect the breasts from bullets!” There has already been some interest in Hollywood, although of course most breasts in Hollywood are already able to stop bullets. There’s not a lot of organic material left in there.
2. JetBlue Airlines is now charging $7 for a blanket and pillow. Now enough is enough! It should be free to suffocate your annoying neighbor [mime with pillow] then wrap him up [mime with blanket].
3. A federal task force says it may be better to not do routine prostate screening at all. NOW they tell us? But what if we like it? Does it count when we have someone just playing the ‘doctor’?
4. In Japan, a new CD is becoming popular that plays harsh noises to get the blood pumping. It apparently features just one side of a Bluetooth conversation.
5. A new study says that an injection of vitamin C may stop cancerous tumors from growing. Man, I have wanted an excuse to mainline orange juice for years. And do the injections come with pulp? Putting the “pulp” back into “Pulp Fiction”.
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