A misguided attempt to start writing jokes based on Slate magazine articles:
1. There have been a string of assaults on people in karaoke bars for singing badly. This isn‘t a new phenomenon, though. It’s why Michael Bolton had to get bodyguards after recording the Beatles’ “Yesterday”.
2. Did you hear about this woman who just gave birth to octuplets? That’s eight babies at one time. Some people are asking what is the highest number of babies that can fit inside one woman? Apparently way way way too many. Maybe this is why some people go into false labor - they’re actually gestating 14 babies, and labor is starting before the eggs are even fertilized.
3. Some people are complaining that the new White House website still looks too similar to Bush’s. Well, Obama’s YouTube site still has a big banner urging people to vote Obama/Biden on November 4th. But maybe they’re actually talking about 2012. What planning!
4. I think “rear projection TVs” are called that because they’re a future projection of how large your rear is going to get if you keep watching so much TV.
5. I understand what how those pets feel. My parents had to hold me down to cut my nails when I was going for the world record for longest nails.
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