1. The top movies in the country are “High School Musical 3” and “Saw”. One is about young people struggling through painful contrived situations, and the other is a horror movie.
2. A new study says that suicide is linked with changes to the brain. Specifically from “cohesive” to “splattered”.
3. The main newspaper of Anchorage, Alaska has endorsed Barack Obama. Their top reason for not supporting McCain: “Because we’ll miss Sarah Palin.” Awww.
4. A man on a train in France got his arm stuck in a toilet, and firefighters had to take him out with the toilet still attached. The worst part was that at least five people urinated on him. This being France, they thought it was a conceptual art piece.
5. Newly developed purple tomatoes can help keep you from getting cancer, because they remind you of what smoker’s lung looks like.
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