9/25

1. Some compromises were made last night in negotiating the giant Wall Street bailout. For example, the Bush Administration agreed to cut executive pay at companies getting bailed out. And Congress agreed that the bill should only pay for one Lawrence Welk museum. Man, they’re always trying to sneak weird things into bills.

2. The bank Washington Mutual went under yesterday. They were in enormous debt, their reputation was shot, and no one trusted them with their money anymore. That’s why they’re called Washington Mutual, because they’re feeling mutual with Washington.

3. In Canada, a Canadian man was found guilty of being part of a plot to storm into the parliament and behead the prime minister. That wouldn’t really change much. Most of the important Canadians live in the U.S.

4. A Palestinian restaurant owner has put his menu on the security barrier between Israel and the Palestinian territories. Now, I don’t know about you, but I think if someone is spray-painting a menu on the ‘security barrier’, maybe it’s not much of a security barrier. If the night watchman at my building is on the sidewalk wearing a sandwich board -- maybe it’s time to upgrade the security.

5. Two pilots who fell asleep during the landing of their airliner are going to be allowed to fly again. I guess the airlines really are hurting for cash. “You’ll work for airline food? You’re hired!”