1. A U.S. citizen has been arrested on suspicion of giving military secrets to, wait for it (pause) Israel. Yeah, you thought I was going to say China, didn’t you? But no, for the second time in recent years, it’s our good friends in Israel spying on us, since apparently they’re not content with the $3 billion in annual military aid that we give them. I think Israel is getting its relationship strategies from my ex-girlfriend.
2. Hillary Clinton has won the Democratic primary in Pennsylvania, beating Barack Obama. Clinton had said that she thought “a win under any circumstances” would be “a terrific achievement”. Really? How about strapped to a chair, surrounded by angry weasels? I’m sure some Obama fans could arrange that.
3. The website EBay has now sued the website Craig’s List for taking actions that unfairly jeopardize Ebay. Like offering all the things that EBay does, but for free.
4. A former Khmer Rouge leader wants to be released while he waits for trial. Oh, poor baby. You know, the Khmer Rouge had a system for releasing people before trial. I think it was called “shooting them”.
5. Scientists say that people were doing oil painting in Afghanistan over six centuries before Europe. So if that time scale holds true, in about 2300 AD, Europeans will start blowing up Renoirs.
No comments:
Post a Comment