4/12

1. The king of Norway has opened a new opera house there. He said he’s tired of all those fakers around the world wearing Viking helmets.

2. In Israel, some soldiers have gotten in trouble for posting militarily sensitive photos all over the internet. Apparently, they were all working for Google.

3. Defense Minister Robert Gates, speaking about Moqtada al-Sadr, said that “those who are willing to work within the political process in Iraq, and peacefully, are not enemies of the United States.” To this, Sadr replied: “I have no enemy but you… till the last drop of blood.” Okaaay. I think that might be a no. When my ex-girlfriend said that, I knew things weren’t going to well.

4. Chinese President Hu Jintao gave a speech about Tibet yesterday that was widely hailed as a breakthrough, because it managed to have almost zero true statements. Guinness has been notified.

5. The painting “Benefits Supervisor Sleeping” is likely to set a new price record this week. Can we see a shot of the painting? (Show image.) It’s expected to sell for much more than the recent nude photo of the French First Lady. And people wonder why the British keep moving to France.