1. In London, counter-terrorism squads evacuated a building because of a feared chemical attack. When they broke down the door of the Thai restaurant where fumes were coming from, they found… Thai food. Apparently it overwhelmed the usual London odor of greasy fish and beer. “What is that smell? It doesn’t seem like rancid beans. It certainly can’t be coming from a restaurant.”
2. A man in Oregon was banned by his local city council from gardening in the nude. He says he just wanted to give the cucumbers an example to live up to.
3. The president of South Korea drove to a summit in North Korea in a Mercedes S600 Guard limousine, which can withstand machine gun fire and grenades while still offering “outstanding comfort”. But this is North Korea -- you’re either going to get attacked by nukes or slingshots. There’s no in-between.
4. Capsaicin, the chemical that makes chili peppers hot, is now being used as a pain-killer. Unfortunately, all the pain just gets saved up for when you go to the bathroom.
5. New studies show that men tend to sleep better with a partner, while women don’t. I know that’s the case in my house, but I sleep with a knife.
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