1. A hunter in Iowa was shot in the leg after a dog stepped on his gun. The shot also hit one of the roughly 500,000 presidential candidates currently in the state, who was busy campaigning to some gophers. Local farmers were glad, because most of the candidates haven’t raised any money, so they’rve been devouring crops.
2. An artist has carved a naked chocolate Jesus in New York City. He said that like Jesus coming down from the cross, it would be a little sticky and surrounded by women.
3. A museum in England will display a 116-year-old orange found in a lunchbox. It is the only known record of an Englishman willingly choosing to eat a fruit or vegetable.
4. According to Forbes magazine, Elvis continues to be the top-earning dead celebrity. That is, among those dead celebrities whose followers do not claim them to be divine. Well, okay, scratch that. How about “not held responsible for miracles”. No, wait, scratch that too. I guess they’re going to have to take Elvis off the list. Number Two is Burt Reynolds. Not technically dead, but might as well be after “Universal Soldier III: Unfinished Business”.
5. The cabin crews of Air France are on strike. Passengers are now free to move around the cabin.
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