1. Stock markets plummeted after Dubai said it might not make payments on its $60 billion in debt. However, I don’t think Dubai really gets it, since it later announced plans to build the world’s biggest debt clock.
2. A new study says people who over-exercise are at risk of arthritis. Which explains why my thumb joints have been hurting ever since I got a satellite dish.
3. Somali pirates have taken a huge oil tanker headed for the U.S. Now we might really get some action on them, because you don’t mess with America’s oil. The wrath of Navy SEAL snipers is nothing compared to 200 million American commuters.
4. The Vatican has condemned Switzerland’s new ban on Muslim minarets. You know, when even the Vatican says you’re being intolerant of Muslims, maybe it’s time to step back and think a bit. And the Pope is protected by the Swiss Guard. Now he’s going to have to hire a Swiss Guard Guard.
5. Banks say it’s been very hard to quickly arrange documents to modify loans for people facing foreclosure. I guess they lost all the amazing workers who sped through those piles of dodgy subprime mortgages a few years ago.
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