1. Carrie Prejean called Larry King “inappropriate” last night when he asked why she settled her lawsuit with the Miss California Pageant. Larry King? Inappropriate? This is a man who thinks a hard-boiled question is “What did you have for breakfast?” She then threatened to leave the show when King took a call from a gay man. Said Prejean: “I believe phone sex should only be between a man and a woman.”
2. An accused robber was released because he made a Facebook update just one minute before the robbery. Lucky he had a judge who never heard of wifi. Later that day, the judge released a suspected mugger because he made a phone call one minute before the mugging. “How could he make a phone call and be out on the street at the same time?”
3. An Australian bomb-sniffing dog lost in Afghanistan has been found after 14 months. However, there are fears that the dog might have been recruited by the Taliban, because he will no longer eat Snausages.
4. A couple in Phoenix were arrested for stealing almost 1,000 pieces of luggage from the local airport. Most of the thefts were never reported, because they targeted men who looked likely to pack a lot of porn. They were eventually caught after stealing the luggage of Dick Cheney.
5. Sarah Palin told Oprah that Levi Johnston is “still part of the family”. She then added: “Because you want to keep your friends close, but your enemies even closer.” This is also why Palin keeps books in her house.
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