1. The great yoga master Pattabhi Jois died this week. Luckily they’ll save money on the coffin, because they can just roll him up in a ball.
2. Barack Obama and Dick Cheney will both give speeches on anti-terrorism policy today. Do you think they’ll have different things to say? As part of Obama’s anti-terrorism policy, though, he’s planning on stopping Cheney’s speech.
3. Yesterday, a doctor in Australia used a common household drill to do brain surgery. And last year, Australian doctors kept a man alive with an IV of pure vodka. I that hear next year, Australian doctors are planning to use a leaf blower, but they’re just not sure how yet.
4. New laws say that credit card companies have to be more truthful about their policies. In fact, American Express just started mailing out envelopes reading: “You’ve already been pre-approved to buy useless junk and make us rich!”
5. Michael Vick is moving from prison to home confinement today. There are hopes that he will one day be able to re-enter society just like his dogs -- with lots of love, plenty of walks, and a good tummy rub.
No comments:
Post a Comment