1. Two child actors from the movie “Slumdog Millionaire” are going to be moved to better housing, after it was discovered that they’re still living in the slums. You mean they didn’t get paid enough to move into an apartment? Is this the future of movies? We’re going to start outsourcing them to India? The Indian government said that “since the children have made the nation proud, they must be given houses.” Which is the opposite of the way American bailouts work.
2. The government made 750 arrests across the country connected to Mexican drug cartels, including a lot of people in Minnesota. Really? I always thought they were sniffling from the cold.
3. After two failed attempts to nominate a Commerce Secretary, Obama’s latest nominee is named Gary Locke. Locke. I think there was some subconscious decision-making on that one. The back of his mind was thinking: “We have to pick someone who will be a lock. Lock. Gary Locke!”
4. The government has released rules for its test to see if banks are stressed. For example, if instead of ATMs, they’re offering Ambiens.
5. Did you hear about that big plane crash in the Netherlands? It was all over the news. Most of the passengers were revealed to be Turkish instead of European, so then the media could focus on other things.
No comments:
Post a Comment