1. A new study says that smokers are more likely to quit if you bribe them with cash. I think this is a bad idea in a recession, because you’re going to see a lot of people taking up smoking. Just to quit. You know who I saw buying a pack of Camels today? Richard Simmons.
2. Israel is going to allow 25,000 flowers grown in Gaza to be sent to Europe for Valentine’s Day. (sweet voice) Because Gaza just loves Europe so much. And you know, dating in Gaza is getting rough - I’m not going to say much, but this is true, most of their flowers this Valentine’s Day are going to be given to sheep. They say it’s just for food, but when you look into those eyes…
3. Apparently, when French President Nicolas Sarkozy met his second wife, cover model Carla Bruni, he told her that she would be Marilyn to his JFK. Really? Then he should have stayed married to his first wife.
4. A new study says that Neanderthals never interbred with humans. Unless you count the couples on most sitcoms.
5. A new study says that it’s healthy to eat as many eggs as you want. Unless the eggs are cooked Dick Cheney style, which means covered in chocolate and bacon.
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