2/21

1. Scientists have now found hard evidence (sorry) that the G spot exists. They found an area of thicker tissue in the vaginas of women reporting G spot orgasms. However, this might just be a callus from having so much more sex. One news article said (true) that “the thicker tissue might actually be part of the clitoris - another extremely sensitive area”. Really? The clitoris is extremely sensitive? I’m sure your wife will be glad that you’ve discovered that. Slate magazine actually headlined their article: “Fire in the Hole”.

2. A new video game controller gives an on-screen character the same facial expressions as the person with the controller. It’s apparently already being used by Hillary Clinton’s handlers.

3. In honor of Barack Obama’s father being from Kenya, a brand of beer there has been named after Obama. It’s served in jugs, which they emphasize is not because of the shape of his ears. You know, a bar near my house renamed the “kamikaze” the “Bill Clinton” after the way he’s been flying his reputation into his wife’s campaign.

4. Obama and Clinton are going to debate tonight, in the oldest high school election ever - the Overachiever vs. the Cool Guy. Obama is the Democrat’s version of George W. Bush.

5. In Tennessee, lawmakers are trying to ban discussion of homosexuality in schools. Its ancient art program was immediately cancelled. In related news, they’ve also fired all their drama teachers.