Wednesday, December 5, 2007

12/5

1. As people get older, they lose brain material called “white matter”. Some people are thinking of renovating the brain stem to bring white matter back, but for now, it’s still kind of scary, even though the location is great and the rent is cheap.

2. Kiefer Sutherland has begun a 48-day sentence for drunk driving. He was convicted when his only defense was: “You’re just going to have to trust me, Your Honor.”

3. An NYPD officer who failed a drug test has sued to get his job back, after his wife said that she spiked his meatballs with marijuana. She hoped that he would fail the drug test so that he would then have to retire. Yeah, that’s the sign of a healthy marriage. I want my husband to spend more time at home, so I’m going to have him dishonorably discharged -- giving him far more free time to dwell on his disgrace.

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